Second Culture Mommy

17 02 2014

L'union failt la forceI was not born in the US. I was born and raised in Haiti. I moved here officially eleven years ago and have established this country as my new home. This was never my intention. The original plan was to come, study, experience the country and go back to my Haiti where I would build a great career with my U.S. diploma. I have my network down there, my parents home and everything at my disposal. No brainer.
And then, while getting my master’s degree, I fell for the trap. I fell in love. Crazy, make your head spin and heart beat faster love. He was intelligent, good looks, great smile,… I can go on but you get the picture. Funny thing is he was Haitian too but has already been living here, had an established career and had no intention of going back our Motherland. So…I did what made most sense, I stayed here.
All of this background to get to today’s topic: Dual cultures, can that be past down? I’m curious because nowadays, having Minnie Me, I am full of questions about how to raise right, to be a good person, etc… But also, how to give her a Haitian and an American culture in a non-confusing manner. Fun story, she came home the other day and wanted to play. She held my hands and wanted to spin around and started to sing :”ring around the rosy…”. I’m like what the heck is that? And then the more I listened, the song sounded familiar but it was definitely something that I didn’t learn from my childhood. It was something from the children around here. That made me wonder. I am all about her leaning these songs and I will learned them so that I could play with her (I am that kind of mom). I wonder if I could show her the games that I’ve played, the songs that I’ve learned. I loved my little french and creole songs. I loved the fun games from my childhood and I still remember most of them. How do I implement that? How have parents done it before me? Did they not care? Or were they so preoccupied in learning a new culture themselves that they just encourage their children to learn to become somewhat of a guide in this new world? Ever wonder?


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21 02 2014
jnmaslov

In my humble opinion, please try when you can to teach Minnie Me about your heritage, culture. She will learn about the American culture on her own.
Yes, it can be overwhelming in this busy world we live in, but the precious time you have with her sing your childhood songs, or follow a ritual you did as a child.
The nubby is doing what he can to pass on his language to our sons, I don’t have the language, but I do have a rich culture to pass on to them, as well; things I did with my grandmother I would love to keep alive and pass on to them.
It’s the little things that they remember and carry with them through their lives.
Teach her the creole language, the games, the songs, cook the food and all the wonderful things of your childhood and your country, and they will live on in her and she in turn will pass them on to her children.

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